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Dearest Annie,

I too was under the affects of that strange air, and Lucius tells me that it was because of some strange mist that came out of a cannister. It was a truth serum of sorts, so, with that being said:

If you would ever like a friend to lean on for those moments of grief, please feel free to reach out to me. I was just as honest about my own past experiences.

With love,
Eridanus Sungazer

Dear Eridanus, You know Lucius too? He's been a good friend to me during all of this. I hope I didn't embarrass him when we were working together this past week. I'll admit that it felt like my filters were stripped away, so I kept feeling everything very strongly. I was a little silly around him when I wasn't focused on the puzzle we had. Thank you. I do have problems with depression. It gets as bad as I said it does. The grief just sometimes makes it feel heavier. I think I'm coping a bit better than before because you let me properly vent. Frankly, I'm mostly embarrassed because I openly flirted with at least three boys. One of them I don't even actually like as a person. I think he's horrible and if I could still wear boots I would prefer crushing him under one. Take care of yourself. With love, Annie Dyer

Edited (Forgot html) 2020-09-22 22:44 (UTC)

[Hol up.

Eridanus' next message is written hastily and without formalities!]

You know of Lucius?

[She even called him a good friend.]

I have been living with him for the past couple of weeks after Rosefica and I's separation. He is also... a good friend of mine.
Interesting. It is a small world it seems.

Depression can make us all do odd things, I am glad you're feeling better after our talk. I feel a bit better, too.
It's nice to be open and honest.

So which boys did you flirt with? Do they know that I will kill them?

I met him a bit before I met you at the museum. Honestly, I'm not sure what to call what we have? He called me a little scholar. When a man laid hands on me without my permission he was right there to help. The man died of course but that was my choice. He had no right to put his hands on a young woman. Then he asked for my help with one of the machines this past week. I'm glad you know him. He's an interesting person. I don't think I want you killing boys just because I flirted with them. They were respectful. I just have no idea how I'll recover from flirting with the one I don't actually like. He annoys me and now has a silly letter I sent as evidence I said something.

[ Feel free to skin "Richard" alive. He deserves it. ]

[Interesting doesn't even cover the half of it, and this new discovery has him intent on questioning his "roommate" for the other half of the details.

Though it seems just like him, Lucius sees potential in Annie. Eridanus doesn't know whether to be concerned or not.]

I see, I met Lucius at the museum. He is certainly a persuasive fellow. I do find myself admiring how he lives his life, unchained by shame or the expectations of anyone but himself.
I am glad he was able to assist you with putting down that scum.

Lucius told me of his experimentation with the vial the two of you broke out of its casing. That is how I know it to be truth-telling serum.

[And he'll leave the rest of those details out.]

You are a healthy young girl Annie, everyone gets a crush or two in their young years. Unfortunately, it sounds as if you've gotten yourself into a situation.
Perhaps you should just kill the one you don't like, as well?]

[ Annie thinks she is handling her friendship with Lucius just fine; so the actual answer is to be very concerned. ]

Considering we both grew up with Expectations? I can see why someone like him is an appealing friend to have. A friend is frankly all I want from him in spite of how I acted last week. The years of life experience he has had make him too 'old' for someone as young and human-minded as me. No. That would require going near him. I can't let him have that leverage. He doesn't deserve the energy of my rage anyways. I'll just have to be careful with the other two. One was trying to be a good friend to me before all this. He was sweet. Someone like him I'll have to let down gently if he assumes too much. Frankly I don't know how I actually feel. He's been so nice to me. Every time I meet him face to face he treats me exactly how I want to be. The other one? I have no idea what he's really like. Just that he's a fellow monster like all the others. I don't think we should just kill monsters to make our social lives easier.

[ Babbling about Judai and how nice has been makes Annie well, blush. Does she actually like him or does she just like being treated well?

Annie doesn't know. God, that is so complicated. Why can't it be easy? ]

[Eridanus is very concerned and may or may not threaten Lucius with what might happen if he ever harms Annie. It's death. The answer is death.

Nevertheless, he is comforted by the fact that Annie only sees him as a friend... how awkward would that have been?]

He certainly is old, far older than I am, even if he acts like a petulant child sometimes.

[Frankly, it's kind of endearing. Like owning a spoiled cat.]

I'm rather curious what sweet boy has caught your affections. He must be quite the catch, considering your track record with men. No desires to bludgeon or eat him is probably a good sign.
If he's so nice to you, and you haven't felt the prickle of deceit behind it, why not approach him to spend more time together?
It sounds to me like he enjoys your company just as much as you enjoy his.

Oh and... just say the word, I can easily take care of the other one. I am forever your ally, dearest Annie.

Seriously. He may be a dish I wouldn't mind trying but I couldn't deal with that plus his age. Plus I'm pretty sure he sees me as a baby murder child.

[ Define eat. ]

The first time we met he thought I was just this tiny little lost young girl and tried to warn me how dangerous it was. He didn't want anyone eating me. Then he realized I was new and was just so nice. Next time we met he thought someone was threatening me and came to my defense without thinking about it. I don't think he's capable of hiding how he feels about people. It's refreshing to meet someone who I'm not doing social gymnastics with. I think I'll wait and see with the other. If he isn't as sweet as he was the last time I'll handle it. I want nothing to do with the third. I've been calling him Richard since he doesn't have a real name. It's a bit of a play on words because a nickname for Richard is 'dick' and well, he was mean to an infant native monster.

[As Eridanus reads, all he can think is how very Lucius-like. The man was likely the worst horror most would ever come to know, and yet his gentleness with those he deemed worthy of it is like no other. A swell of pride fills Eridanus' chest, but he pushes it away because this conversation is no about how much he adores Lucius.

It's about Annie being boy-crazy.]

As a founding member of the mental gymnastics game, I too find his demeanor to be refreshing. His drive in life is unfettered and rough, like a diamond fresh from the earth. There is never a doubt whether he likes you or not, which I find much more enjoyable as his ally than foe.

[Don't worry Annie, he's coming back to that dish comment.]

Sometimes the things you say catch me off guard, dearest Annie, but always in the best of ways.
It sounds as if things are better off severed with this man, then. Though I am becoming a bit concerned with how often you find yourself in situations where you are surrounded by... questionable men.

Also, what do you mean by a "dish" you wouldn't mind "trying".

[There it is.]

Oh. Oh. I wasn't talking about Lucius. Although it would seriously be embarrassing for me if I reacted like that to him. That was all Judai. I can see where Lucius would be similar. The problem is knowing he's dangerous. There's enough about him where I know I have to be careful on how much I listen because he gets so much enjoyment out of seeing how far we'll go. I've noticed that too? It's why I've been trying to step back a bit. Some self-reflection. I need more girls my age around, honestly. As bad as that sounds it's why I might ask a girl I've started to become friends with if she'd like to join me. She is right about my age. There was this other girl I thought I could be friends with too but I guess the Fog or Fourth didn't care for her since she's not here. If Daenrys was still here I would invite her into the home I'm having Mana build. You know. Flirt. I'm not really in a state where I could go much past flirting. Usually when people say that they mean more but frankly that's not me? With everything that's happened I'm just not someone who would be very interested in certain levels of casual (and close) physical intimacy.

[Eridanus would be lying if he said he didn't sigh with relief. Otherwise that would have been a very awkward conversation on how Lucius has done worse things to children than just being mean to them.

Even he doesn't like to think about it.]

I have never met this Judai fellow, but I hope to some day. Especially if you're interested in him romantically.

[HINT HINT.]

I know we're separated now, but perhaps you could spend time with Rosefica too? I know she is lonely, and I am partially to blame.
I think she might be able to lend you some motherly council, where I may fall short.
And don't let our long lifespans fool you, Rosefica is actually the elven equivalent to a human in their young adult years. She may be more relatable than you think.

Also, I am glad to hear you are not the type to... give yourself easily.
Not that it is bad but, at your age, taking things slow so that you may figure out what you want is likely the wiser course of action.

[ Annie is literally talking about three guys at once.

Altair is also on the "what was I doing last week" list but hasn't merited mention. Eridanus seems ready to go track Judai down and interrogate him.

What are your intentions towards his scorpion child? God, Eridanus is acting exactly like a Dad. ]

So you're not going to track Richard down? I'm sort of glad. I mean he's annoying but I think I can handle him. Judai is someone I'll have to think on. I know he's sweet. I know I reacted to him strongly last week but that could have been the drugs toying with me, and he's the kind of guy I wouldn't want to hurt. At the very least I like the idea of having another lady who gets how hard some of the social gymnastics of being what we are. Rosefica was super amazing. As for romance: After Dylan slow burn is the best burn. It's why I'm embarrassed over how I reacted so easily last week. You need to know if you can trust people. There are too many dangerous people even if some of us are preaching being good to our fellow monsters. Like AM. He is a creep and a predator. I don't care how he was last week. I would rather seem him bodily launched into the stars than trust him.

[ Shit. Annie reads that over. Is she actually considering getting close to Judai? She starts picking at her claws in thought. Would it be a bad idea? ]

[Eridanus is keen to reply calmly until...]

AM.

That beast is a walking insult to everything I know. A demon who clumsily trounces around in his flesh like he's still a toddler, who wields fire like it's a fist.
He had the audacity to invite me out for a blood-raising duel to the death in the Cube and what does he do?
He instead changes his invite, and asks me out for TEA!

[Did he just use caps? He totally did.]

I WAS FORCED TO ENDURE HIS PETTY ATTEMPTS AT PSYCHOLOGICAL TORTURE, WHERE HE TRIED TO MAKE ME BELIEVE WE WERE FRIENDS! CAN YOU BELIEVE THAT? ME, FRIENDS WITH A LOATHSOME DEMON LIKE HIM?

I WAS SO DISGUSTED BY HIS CHARADE I FELT LIKE VOMITTING, AND I WISH I HAD! RIGHT ONTO HIS ASANINE CURLY WHITE FUR!

[Eridanus may or may not have slapped the caps-lock button and didn't know how to turn it off. Or he was just angry. Maybe both.

He has also completely forgotten about boy-talk.]

[ Holy.

Holy shit. Annie never thought she would see Eridanus react so angrily.

This is not like a hate boner or anything. This is straight-up set AM on FIRE if he can. Tell Annie how you really feel. ]

It was the drugs. Where they stole my filters they turned him into that strange white haired thing. Do not forget what he is. The Fog God made his form a demon for a reason. I will NEVER trust him. If that was what he was with his personality flipped last week think of how terrible he must be. I don't want him near me. Just the fact we live in the same city unnerves me.

Oh, I know how terrible he is. I prefer him that way.
I want him to be his untainted self, full of hatred and seething. I want to watch his eyes glaze over with horror when he realizes he is not the being he believes himself to be. I want to watch his smug expression fall away from his face, instead replaced with anguish wrought by my claws.

I will make him pay for his repugnant display by goring his belly and pulling fist-fulls of his entrails out with my bare hands.

[Ok, actually? Deep breaths.]

...But yes, I agree. AM is detestable and I do not trust him. I am glad we agree there.

[ Oh. He really did tell her how he feels.

Damn, he really is one of the dangerous men of Ryslig. Yet Annie knows he isn't dangerous to her. They care about each other. ]
You're angry because you feel cheated. You wanted a fight and you had it snatched from you by someone you would rather crush. You will get to ruin him. You also get to remind him the next time you speak of every little thing you did while having tea. I don't know what you said or did but I would have walked all over him had I been in the right frame of mind.

[ Go full Mean Girls. ]

[Annie gets it. This is why Eridanus loves Annie. She is a good bean.]

Oh I will be sure to rub every mortifying action he took in his face and watch his expression twist with shame.
It's what he rightly deserves.

I would be happy to have you watch my match against him when the dust settles and we're able to pick a date for the Cube once more.

[ Annie let her inner monster out and it felt satisfying. It's a delicate balance between monster and sweet girl but Annie feels like she is doing a good job.

Not everyone needs to see this side of her. ]

It could enrage him. I wonder if his rage cows him? It is a fine line between shame and rage. I want to see him brought low. He's a hate filled thing. He isn't even artistic about it as far as I can tell. I could almost respect an artist. Instead, he's a sad creepy man shaped like a demon. I will happily watch.

I would much rather deal with his rage than... whatever that was. That is not the demon that tried to kill me before, that was an abomination.

[Not to mention it only further solidifies Eridanus' beliefs that no one is truly good-hearted.]

I'll be sure to let you know when it happens...

But onto happier topics:
What else did you do this past week? Besides luring in the hearts of young men across Bavan, and talking to me, of course.

I don't like what was done to him. It's even grosser than other things I can imagine. Psychological torment is like, the worst. I gave a cute dog Lucius and I took from my first meal and gave him to a friend. I think he'll be much happier! (The dog. No idea about my friend. Crabby fellow. Hates fun but I find him a decent guy.)

How fortunate for your friend.

[Sarcasm—Eridanus hates dogs.]

It sounds to me like you've been on quite the adventure this past month, Annie.
No wonder you wish to lay low.

I feel fortunate enough that mist did not affect my psyche beyond making me inherently truthful.

[ It was a small white fluffy thing. It barely counted as a dog. ]

Between that and my actual job? I have been busy. I noticed that my ability to filter and mask my feelings was just gone. That's what got me into trouble. Anything I felt was intense and almost demanding? I don't like that. I like being able to think things through.

[Huh, that feels like his normal psychology now.]

I came to terms with feelings such as those rather early on in my arrival to Ryslig. Apparently trolls are prone to extreme mood swings, which I have certainly felt.

[And showed her!]

It's still rather jarring, especially since I used to be so level-headed before.

I like to think I was level-headed. Honestly I just put on a really good front. I did notice some slow changes to how I think? I'm having difficulty not cleaning everything. It's an obsession at this point. I was not this bad before now.

Rosefica is the same way, she has always been meticulous before but it's worse now.
It's likely a thing of arachne psychology.

I can't see how a clean home is a bad thing, perhaps you can come clean our apartment.
Lucius doesn't clean, though I'm not sure if it's because he doesn't know how to, or that he doesn't care... And I try but I am no good at it.

Edited 2020-09-24 07:10 (UTC)

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<archmage> cw: uh, minor gore ideation?

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WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, ERIDANUS SUNGAZER. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 099.23.886.00 * Archmage has joined 099.23.886.00 <Archmage> Hello, this is Eridanus Sungazer. <Archmage> In the event I am currently unavailable, please leave a message. <Archmage>** I will answer back, promptly. If I feel you are worth the trouble.